Coach Sappho’s Podcast is tomorrow night; farewell Mimi La Rue…

August 19th, 2008

For those of you who believe in the power of prayer, please say a few tonight for residents on the east coast of Central Florida.  They are getting pummeled by Tropical Storm Fay and it ain’t pretty.  I just can’t believe the storm seems to have slid just to the southeast of us.

Today was, no pun intended, a ‘wash’ for me.  I think I burned out over the weekend and yesterday, preparing for the storm!  No, but seriously, it’s late and, after switching channels away from the nonstop weather coverage, I happened upon a new episode of Tori and Dean (I didn’t realize they are still putting out new episodes this season).

This episode is an ‘overview’ of everything Tori and Dean have been through this past year.  And perhaps the most touching was their piece on the passing of Tori’s beloved pug, Mimi La Rue, including her funeral.  There wasn’t a ‘dry eye’ in the place.  Reminds me of my mom’s beloved chihuahua Chica and her funeral over 14 years ago now.  My parents rescued Chica and what a loving spirit she was!

Tori started a foundation for sick and injured animals in Mimi’s name called Much Love.  Be sure to stop by the Mimi La Rue/Much Love Foundation website and make a donation!

And - don’t forget tomorrow night is Coach Sappho live podcast night.  BTW - tomorrow night’s podcast is a special edition.  I’ll be leading listeners in a rich discussion/focus group helping Coach Sappho decide on the podcast’s look/feel/sound for 2009.  This is your chance to put in your ‘two cents’ worth!  If you are already a subscriber, stay tuned for an email explaining how to join us and, if you aren’t yet a podcast subscriber, just click here to join us.  It’ free!

Barb Elgin

It’s official - Ellen and Portia are ‘wife and wife’ - this inquiring mind wants to know - are Ellen and Portia taking a honeymoon?

August 17th, 2008

I just learned that Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi did ‘tie the knot’ last night at their home in Beverly Hills, California.  Click here for a great article talking about the wedding as well as Portia talking about how meeting Ellen made her ‘weak in the knees’ and loving Ellen helped her overcome her fears of coming out as a lesbian. 

What I wonder is this - will Ellen and Portia be taking a honeymoon?  If so are they doing it right away or ???  And, if they are taking a honeymoon, how are they celebrating?  Where are they going?

I hope if you know or find out you’ll post your comments here!

Have a fantastic Sunday - over here we’re preparing for the arrival of Mz. Fay, AKA the hurricane!!!  Please tell Mother Nature to blow Fay out into the Atlantic…..

Barb Elgin

When you’re a lesbian and single again…where do you begin?

August 16th, 2008

I was speaking with a new client this morning who recently ended an 8 year relationship with another woman.  She feels she is ‘healing’ and says she wants me to help her overcome the ’serial monogamy’, u-haul game and find a lifelong partner the next time around.

What a great time, btw, for someone to enlist support!  I remember back to my therapy training days when we learned that crises may seem overwhelming but they are also a time when we are more open to change.  That’s right - the Chinese were right - crisis =’s opportunity!  And making some internal changes (as well as some changes in her actions) will be required of this client if she expects to ever stop ‘leasing’ U-Hauls!!!  Read the rest of this entry »

Lesbians and Money - Are You Living Beyond Your Means?

August 15th, 2008

I just came inside from cutting some palm trees (they are growing like crazy due to all of the rain), and after a shower happened to switch the channel away from the Olympics and found Bill Moyers interviewing Andrew Bacevich.  Fascinating interview.  Be sure you go by the PBS website and learn more about this guy.  A must see, whether or not you are looking for something to watch.

What’s the big deal?  What’s Bacevich got to do with lesbians and their money?  Bacevich is to the larger picture of our country and where it’s headed economically as Suze Orman is to our personal finances.  Interestingly enough, he’s a former military man (a West Point grad and retired army colonel no less).  He’s also an academic (he’s now a professor of international relations at Boston University).  I wonder if he’s an ‘independent’.  He sure seems like it!

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Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi to Marry in California this Weekend!

August 15th, 2008

I just learned from US Magazine that Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi will get married this weekend in front of a small group of friends and family.  DeGeneres and de Rossi have been dating since 2004.  Coach Sappho would like to congratulate Ellen and Portia and wish them many happy years of wedded bliss!  Ellen and Portia thus start a ’short list’ of visible, celebrity lesbian couples who’ve legally tied the knot.  Not celebrities but well known include Phyllis Martin and Del Lyon, who were the honorary first couple to marry back in June in California when same sex marriage became legal. 

Other lesbian couples who’ved married in recent years, but not yet legally, are Melissa Etheridge and Tammy Lynn Michaels and Rosie and Kelli O’Donnell.

What do you think?  What can you add?  Post your comments here and let Ellen and Portia know what you think! 

Barb Elgin

Being Gay and Gay Marriage is a Point of Difference, Not a Disability!

August 15th, 2008

But when gays are seen as the same as straights—as individuals; as normal, well-adjusted, human individuals—the argument changes altogether. The question becomes a matter of how we treat a minority with an involuntary, defining characteristic along the lines of gender or race. And when a generation came of age that did not merely grasp this intellectually, but knew it from their own lives and friends and family members, then the logic for full equality became irresistibleWhat California’s court did, then, was not to recognize a new right to same-sex marriage. It was to acknowledge an emergent cultural consensus.

…to see this movement we are a part of as a human endeavor to bring love and civility and family into lives that have sometimes been denied all of the above.  We were denied no love that night, and received so much support and kindness and affirmation that we’re still a little giddy. It was more than I ever expected, in a place I love, with people who love both Aaron and me.

- Andrew Sullivan

So is THIS what it’s like when you discover, and live, your career purpose (or some will say ‘when you discover and commit to a very personally and professionally meaningful career purpose?).  I am asking myself these questions today as I continue to be amazed at the excitement I am feeling these days.  Along with the feelings of confidence and ‘whee’, are the occasional fear-based thoughts such as ‘how in the world do I handle it?’, but when those ’small’ thoughts attempt to creep into my heart and mind, I keep in mind beliefs such as a trust in myself and what I believe my larger mission to be and I keep in mind the larger fabric of why I am here!  And, for those of you who say fears are good, I say, yes, they are, when they direct us to better prepare for whatever it is we are creating.  When someone challenges you, or plays ‘devil’s advocate’ particularly if that someone has experience in whatever it is we are trying to accomplish, that’s a GOOD thing. 

How about you?  Are you living a ‘full out’ life?  However you define that?

I had an email conversation with a client this week that I thought I’d share.  She mentioned that she found she’d rather ‘live life as it comes’ and not get caught up in alot of goals or visions.  We went back and forth on that one, so, I will say to you:  Are you the kind of person who is thrilled by creating a grand vision and then drawing it to you OR are you more like my client?  My sense is that there is no one right answer here.  Perhaps having ‘no vision’ is in itself visionary???  I hope you’ll click on the comments link here and let us know what YOU think or feel (or both)…

Today’s post is simply the attention I pay to Andrew Sullivan’s upcoming Atlantic Montly article, ‘My Big Fat Straight Wedding’, where he talks about the landmark California marriage ruling and how getting married changed his life.  I was drawn to this article because I think Andrew so clearly describes the subtle and not-so-subtle transformation that occurs - in AND AROUND YOU - when you go from ‘being a gay couple’ to ‘becoming spouses like everyone else’.  Read the rest of this entry »

Get Cruise-y with Sweet and Be Treated Like a Queen!

August 7th, 2008

Recently, I happened upon a new, fresh-faced lesbian cruise company that is ’making a big splash’ onto the lesbian travel scene.  That cruise company - Sweet - is the baby of a talented and passionate-about-her-ideas woman by the name of Shannon Wentworth.  Shannon has launched this environmentally and community-minded cruise company and she’s pulling out all the stops on Sweet’s maiden voyage - no pun intended - which happens next year, with a program called the Sweet 100 Rewards Program.  Basically it works like this - be one of the first 100 ladies to book your cruise and be treated like the queen you are:

Be sure you stop by Sweet’s website and check it all out.  This is one merry band of lesbians to keep yer eyes on!

Barb Elgin

Become Irresistibly Single - Beginning August 11th - Grab Your Spot Now and Receive an ‘Early Bird’ Discount

August 6th, 2008

You know, it can be a tough world out there.  Particularly when you are single.  There is, as a guest on tonight’s virtual mingle for lesbians said, ‘a pressure to couple’ in our world that can leave us vulnerable to choosing haphazardly in the love game.  Add to the mix our current economic woes and many singles are ‘high-tailing’ it to get into any relationship rather than taking care to choosing the right relationship for them.  It is during times like these that we can lose our way.

Coach Sappho wants to help you realize there is no rushing good loving!  There is no rush to couple.  In fact, if you are single right now, what a special opportunity you have, should you choose to avail yourself of it.  You have the opportunity to use this time in your life to ‘get it together’ as a confident, attractive person who is her own person first.  One of my colleagues calls it ‘marrying yourself’ first.

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Keeping cool as we say yes to fairness for all families…

August 5th, 2008

“I paid good money for symmetry…” 
- Tori Spelling, talking to one of her fans about her breasts during a book signing

Well, I’d say we have about six to eight more weeks of furnace-like heat here in Central Florida.  How about you?  Perhaps more importantly:  if you’re hot like me, what are you doing to stay cool?  I know I say the summers here are similar to the winters up north - you stay inside as much as you can!  I know one of my ‘guilty pleasures’ or heat distractors so far this summer has been watching Tori & Dean - Home Sweet Hollywood.  I’ve been recording the show for a friend of mine who won’t pay for cable and, it’s comforting watching it throughout the day as I work.

Okay, I admit - I’m a boomer who’s a 90210 fan.  My ex and I always enjoyed watching Tori and those other 90210 kids during the 1990’s.  Tori & Dean is a cute, sweet reality show and I’m happy for Tori in that it looks like the show and her new book is catapulting her out of the lower upper class doldrums her father’s passing and her mom’s dissing created for her.  Read the rest of this entry »

Deals for Gay Newlyweds; Suzanne Westenhoefer Gets Engaged; Deciding Who to Invite to Your Gay Wedding; Lesbian Social Mingle 8/6/08 8p ET

August 4th, 2008

As we embark on another busy week, I thought I’d send your way some tidbits you might be interested in knowing about, so you can be the most knowlegeable lesbian on your street…  ;[)

AAA, when are you going to offer gay newlyweds benefits equal to all newlyweds?

In honor of the fact I had to tap my AAA membership last week (via a flat tire!), I’ve decided to offer them a challenge.  This week in the news, it was announced that Better World Club, a nationwide auto club, is offering gay newlyweds who get married before September 20th a free, one year membership!  Thanks Better World, for your ‘out and proud’ recognition of married gay and lesbian couples!  So, AAA, why don’t you offer a similar program?  If you’d like to read about Better World’s promotion, click here.  I also challenge all gays and lesbians who are AAA members to consider contacting AAA and asking them to do the same for their members!

Lesbian Celebrity Weddings:  Suzanne Westenhoefer to Legally Marry Her Girlfriend in Hollywood this September

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