As I’ve coached dozens and dozens of lesbian women over the years, it has occurred to me that for many (I’d like to say ’some’ but then, maybe I’d be deluding myself!), the process of reaching out and getting some good ol’ dating or relationship coaching (even while knowing it could make a dramatically positive difference in one’s life), is – as one of my mentors would say – a daunting, scary or, even radical, idea…

I hope in this post to explain to you why it is worth considering the perhaps ‘radical’ idea of ‘trying some love coaching’…

Let me begin with those who are at least somewhat ‘warmed up’ to the idea.  Perhaps you are someone who has gotten over the initial hump – you’ve gotten results in the past from getting some coaching or expert help in some life area – and you’ve taken a peek at some of what we’ve been talking about here on Coach Sappho’s blog and on Coach Sappho’s website.

Or, perhaps you’ve even furthered your curiosity by ’sampling’ some of what I suggest such as…

• Sticking a toe in the water and signing up for Coach Sappho’s ‘Luscious Love’ Quiz, which is, by the way, free, easy to sign up for and quick to complete. I’m sure if you have signed up and, even better, taken the quiz, you’ve found out the water isn’t too cold AND you’ve gained something from the experience.  Less painful even, than having your temperature taken (by mouth, of course!).  
• Wading into the pool by joining a free resource such as Lez Be Together, our community for lesbian couples and individuals who desire deeply satisfying, lasting relationships.  Or, signing up for free updates from Coach Sappho’s Blog.
• Diving in by hiring me as your coach or, if you are single, joining our premiere social club

If this is you, congratulations.  You are already experiencing the results of investing in you and your happiness.  My advice to you is to: take the next step!  However you define that…if you want help identifying your ‘next step’ just contact me to discuss.

Or, if this is not you, no problem, keep reading.  You’ve not yet warmed up to the idea of a love coach helping you bring even more love into your life, and you’re still skeptical.  You continue to ask ‘why should I give a damn’?

I could quote you studies that show individuals in happy relationships are healthier, wealthier, etc.  And other studies showing that happy singles are healthier than unhappy ones.  I could also quote studies that challenge many of the myths about love relationships you need to get clear on to prevent relationship trouble, breakups, etc.

Unless you’ve ‘given up’ on love, and, in particular, being part of a deeply satisfying, LASTING relationship (and if you have, you really need to consider getting to know me better!), I know you have got to be saying to yourself:  how can I get more of that???

For those of you who hesitate to join us in any way just yet, consider the following analogy: Yes, when you go for your ‘annual physical’ or your yearly GYN visit, you do feel vulnerable.  It’s okay to admit it.  The fact is, you must make yourself vulnerable to visit any doctor.  And, for most of us, that usually means a bit of discomfort and, sometimes, even a bit of pain.

But what is the result? I think most of us would agree, most of the time, we are much better off completing these medical exams as well as any tests that result.  Why? Because we are preventing problems and diseases and/or catching something early so we can hopefully ‘nip it in the bud’ or minimize the type of treatment we will have to endure.

I think the same can be said for the results you can achieve seeking my help in the love arena in your life.  Here again too, perhaps talking with a ‘life’ coach about your life isn’t as scary as talking with a love coach about your dating life or your sex life with your partner.

If you are coupled, I’m not saying you will ever ‘jump with joy’ at the prospect of sitting down with your partner and me to look at how each of you is really feeling about your relationship.  But consider this: what if trouble is brewing in your relationship and you don’t even know it, much like many medical problems, such as high blood pressure or diabetes can manifest themselves silently, without us having any idea?

What if you have no idea, the problems grow or fester and, the next thing you know you are in deep doo-doo? Examples of doo-doo need I remind you can include one or both of you being depressed or, worse yet, contemplating leaving, having an affair, etc.  Don’t fall into the trap many parents of teens do:  oh no, my child would never do that!

Consider this: when you put in your ‘paces’ with this couples coaching thing, perhaps you and your partner come to learn how to create a happier relationship for the BOTH of you, honestly!  Where you both honestly report you are more satisfied (versus faking it or, minimizing or even lying about how you really feel).  Yes, it is possible…

All of this proves my point: coaching is an invaluable resource that can improve your mental health, your dating life, your relationship, etc., because coaching helps you get a higher, broader perspective on your life that helps you identify problems early and, even, before they become problems!  Coaching also helps you figure out how to solve your problems, which are unique for all of us.

Coaching is personalized to your needs.  As your coach, my only agenda is seeing you succeed.  Where else can you get that kind of unbiased, deep support for living your best life???

And, here’s the juiciest secret, which is the reward that goes to those willing to try some coaching: When you take care of maintenance and prevention, much like you do with your doctor and dentist, then, you are freer to delve into more fun topics like: re-igniting your love life, creating an amazing mutual vision for the next year with your partner, etc.!  So, love coaching may ‘hurt’ a bit at first, but, as you build your relationship with it, the returns are substantial.

If you are single and not dating, but you envision a great relationship in your near future, do you really know what to look for in a relationship that will work for you?  Are you clear what hasn’t worked for you in the past so you ‘hopefully’ won’t repeat it?  Hint:  you can know what you need to avoid but still not be able to do it – if that’s you, coaching can help.

If you are single and dating, do you wonder whether this particular woman is ‘the one’ or, are you moving towards commitment too fast or too unconsciously?  Do you even know what I mean? If you don’t I would caution you to get more support.

Here’s the bottom line: I know so many who’ve made a commitment to their own personal and relationship satisfaction by ‘trying some coaching’ and now wonder how they ever got along without the support.  AS ALWAYS, IT’S YOUR CHOICE…

Click here for testimonials from past and current clients, expressing their satisfaction with the Coach Sappho process…

Tags: dating tips and an online love quiz. ">, lesbian relationship coach, life coaching for lesbians, love quiz, love quiz relationship quiz

This entry was posted on Sunday, April 5th, 2009 at 2:29 pm and is filed under Be Ready for Love, Committed Relationships, Lesbian Couples, Lesbian Dating, Pre-Commitment-Is this the Relationship for Me?, Single Lesbians. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.