“All spiritual growth is really about letting go of something. It’s not about gaining anything.“  – Rev. Michael Beckwith

I happened to see an Oprah ’summer rerun’ this afternoon.  The topic: finding one’s spiritual path.  Ahh, I treated myself – it was a pleasure actually sitting down and watching a show without distractions.  The guests included a panel of ’spiritual’ thought leaders including Rev. Michael Beckwith, Rev. Ed Bacon of a ‘progressive’ Episcopolian church in California and Elizabeth Lesser of the Omega Institute (gosh did I used to love looking at their catalogs!).

Below, and interspersed throughout this post, I’m going to quote what was said during the show, which Oprah has put up on her site summarizing the people’s stories shared, because one day she may take those words down and they are so powerful I want to always be able to look at them again.

While the teachers talked with several people who are experiencing some truly huge obstacles, the highlight for myself and, I’m sure gay people around the world came about ten minutes before the show ended.  The panel was taking live, video Skype calls and the one they took at ten before the hour was of an African American man, in his early 30’s, who very openly stated he was gay.

He wanted the teacher’s help as he said he has a long history of running up debts and that he didn’t know why but he was tired of it and wanted to start getting his life together.

Reverent Bacon started right up talking about this crisis really being a chance for the man’s soul to grow and, he said, as hard as that is for everyone it is especially hard for gays because being gay in our world is not usually thought of as a gift, but it is.  Simply put, as I always like to say, the creator doesn’t make accidents!

Oprah, as usual, chimed in with perfect comedic timing, when she said, ‘I think that’s the first religious person I’ve ever met who has ever said being gay is a gift!’  Of course, Beckwith chimed in and high-fived with Bacon and reminded watchers: ‘we are talking here about spirituality, not religion’.

Bacon said that no one in this world succeeds alone and that what the world does to gay people is try to isolate them.  And, as I know, so many of us at so many times in our lives, have let this happen.   For example, many gay people may be 40, 50 or 60 years old and in a gay love relationship but their family doesn’t know.  Or, their family does know but won’t extend the same love and support to their family member, his or her partner and their relationship that they easily extend to the straight couples in the family.

As a result of growing up feeling he had to hide his true self, Elizabeth believes Sedrick could be looking for fulfillment in the wrong places. “Instead of just being genuinely who you are in the world, which is the biggest thrill there is, actually, you start to do things,” she says. “Jumping out of planes or being in debt, because that’s sort of in a twisted kind of way making you feel really alive.”

Sedrick says this is what he has struggled with for most of his life. “I’ve mastered being one person on the outside, and it’s completely opposite of who I am,” he says.  SUCH IS THE STORY OF SO MANY OF US…

So, by reading today’s post, I am sure you will understand why I just had to remark on today’s Oprah.  THANK YOU, Oprah, for bringing this very special group of people to the world’s eyes, ears and hearts.  You don’t know how many hearts you may have changed by this show!

Below, as I promised, what Oprah wrote about each of these spiritual teachers…

• Michael Bernard Beckwith is the founder and spiritual director of Agape International Spiritual Center in Los Angeles. He is a featured teacher in the film and book The Secret and is the author of Spiritual Liberation.

Michael says love, peace, harmony and wisdom are everlasting qualities “They’re real and they’re eternal, and so when an individual is connected to those qualities and begins to exude them and express them, at that moment, they’re in the spirit,” he says. “And when an individual is mature enough to express that on a regular basis, we can say that they’re spiritually mature.” Regardless of the temporary problems you may be experiencing, Michael says the connection to love, peace and harmony stays with you. “That which carries you when you’re going through tough times,” he says. “That’s what it means to be spiritual.”

• Elizabeth Lesser is the co-founder of Omega Institute, America’s largest adult holistic education center, and the author of Broken Open and A Seeker’s Guide.

According to Elizabeth, spirituality is within everyone’s reach. Just as we all have the instinct to eat, sleep and drink, Elizabeth says spirituality is ingrained in all of us. “There’s this instinct inside of each and every one of us that there’s more to life than meets the eye,” she says. Elizabeth says spirituality is our intuition that there is something greater to life than the daily grind. “It’s the fearlessness to ask the big questions,” she says. “Who am I? What’s my purpose? Life? Where do we go when we die? And how do we live a fully alive, meaningful, giving, generous life when we’re here?”

• The Rev. Ed Bacon is the rector of All Saints Episcopal Church in Pasadena, California, a well-known liberal and progressive church in both its theology and politics.

He defines spirituality as a meaningful connection. “It is about our being connected with one another and connected with the cosmos,” he says. “It is the process of being healed, forgiven, empowered to go into the world, to be fully alive.”

The Rev. Bacon says full, unconditional love is the essence of spirituality. “It’s that experience of love that connects you with everyone, connects you with your past, connects you with your future, gives you hope and excitement about going into the next day, going into the next moment.”

Rev. Bacon says crisis is merely the threshold for something bigger to come. “Let the old die because the new is going to be even better than you could ever have imagined,” he says. “The metaphor I love for that is pruning. We get old, nonfruitful parts of our lives are pruned away so that something new and more fruitful can blossom.”

A very cool story recalled by Oprah is the one of the man who survived a plane crash…

“After years of being on television, nothing excites Oprah more than experiencing a defining spiritual moment. “Two years ago, John Diaz was here talking about surviving a horrific plane crash,” Oprah says. “What he said that day is something that I know so many of you who heard it will never forget.”

After the plane crashed, John says he saw people strapped into their seats, burning. As he watched, he says he noticed what appeared to be auras leaving their bodies, some brighter than others. “I thought, ‘The brightness and dimness of the auras were how one lives one’s life,’ so to speak,” he says. “That’s one of the major things that really has changed within me … I want to live my life so my aura, when it leaves, is very bright.”

Elizabeth believes the colorful auras were people who fully lived their lives. “What the world needs are people who have come alive. That’s what we all need to do to become fully ourselves,” she says. “Alive. Joyful. Present in every moment.”

By the way, Oprah ended this episode with a tribute to one of her favorite all time mentors:  little Mattie Stepanek, whom I’ve blogged about before here on this blog (I’m still trying to find the post, unfortuantely, it may have been lost on my old blog server).

Mattie passed away in 2004, but his mom has helped to create a ‘Mattie’ memorial in the Washington, DC.  Oprah was there last October to dedicate the event.  Be sure to stop by Mattie’s site and if you are going to buy one of his books, do so there, so you can help out his foundation, whose mission is to…

“To continue spreading Mattie’s message of hope and peace through ongoing peace programs, and educational and recreational contests in schools and communities.”

For more from today’s Oprah show, click here.

————

Barb Elgin, MSW, LCSW, Certified Singles Coach, is Coach Sappho: America’s Favorite Lesbian Love Coach.  Attract Mz. Right Summer Camp for Single Lesbians starts 6/23/09.  Register by midnight PST on 6/20/09 and save 25% off – click here to learn all the details.

©2009, Barb Elgin.  All Rights Reserved

Disclaimer: The suggestions and feedback offered in this column are but one perspective of multiple approaches to dealing with problems or challenges. Information provided in articles and advice columns should not be used as a substitute for coaching or therapy when these services are needed. None of this information should be your only source when making important life decisions. This information should not be used for diagnosing or treating a particular problem, nor should it take the place of a consultation with a trained professional. It is your responsibility to consult a professional prior to making any life decisions.

Tags: gay is good, gays and god, gays and spirituality, lesbian relationship advice, lesbian relationship expert, lesbian spirituality, Life Purpose, Mattie Stepanek, meaning and purpose, meaning of life, peace and love, sex and spirituality, why am I here?

This entry was posted on Wednesday, June 10th, 2009 at 10:40 pm and is filed under Be Ready for Love, Committed Relationships, Family and Social Support, Lesbian Couples, Lesbian Dating, Lesbians, Love & Money, Marriage Equality, Parenting and Lesbian Relationships, Pre-Commitment-Is this the Relationship for Me?, Single Lesbians. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.