As I travel the country, virtually and, in person, I am constantly meeting single lesbians who ask me questions such as,

“Where can we go on our first date?”

“What are the best restaurants in my city for lesbians?”

And I am always meeting couples who ask me,

“We’ve been staying home for so long we don’t know where to go or what to do on our date night.”

“Where can I take my partner to stir up some fun?”

So, what a fun idea to brainstorm ideas right here on Coach Sappho’s blog.

What’s your favorite lesbian date ideas? Where did you and your partner last go on date night and, how did it go?  What’s been your most memorable, cuddly, sexy, fun date, to date!?!

We’d love to read more about your experiences.  Just think – you can suggest other great ideas for lesbian couples in your city and you can learn ideas you’d never have thought of on your own, by reading this list!

Post your ideas right here on the blog!  Thanks!

So, congratulations!  You’ve made the connection via Coach Sappho’s matchmaking services, online dating or through friends, family or co-workers.

OR, perhaps you want to ask out that special someone you’ve just met (or someone you’ve been admiring for awhile now, from afar).  Now what…

It’s time to go on your first date!

It’s as simple as that, right!?!  Exciting?  Nerve-wracking?  Doesn’t have to be.  Not with Coach Sappho’s tips for great first dates.

First off, you want to start by feeling confident, on the outside and on the inside, for the experience.  Dating is a numbers game, particularly if your goal is finding your Mz. Right.  More importantly, dating is meant to be fun too, so that’s the attitude you must have towards it.  If you are too heavy about the experience, you will defeat your purpose.  Pushing to meet Mz. Right will drive her right away.

So if we take a look at outer topics, that means issues such as your appearance and how you present yourself.  On the inside, that means being aware of all of those emotional and mental elements Coach Sappho has oodles of information and support about, to guide you in gradually zeroing in on a woman you fit well with, not only in the short run, but for the long haul!

So, stay tuned for my next post, where I’ll share tips on preparing for that first date!

I’m excited to let you know I’ve started watching the Real L Word (including Natalie Garcia’s Showtime Real L Word video blog) and I can’t wait to start talking about all of the characters, and the drama, very soon…So stay tuned.

The topic of today’s post is closely related to lesbian love drama, btw. This week a study broke in the media on the ‘divorce virus’.  Divorce virus, you say?  Yes.

The study, led by James Fowler, is a retrospective longitudinal one, meaning they looked at data from other studies such as the Framingham Heart Study.  The study found that relationship breakups can be as contagious as the flu…

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When it comes to today’s world, and especially the ‘internet world’, all of us are awash in a sea of information, aren’t we?  The same is definitely true when it comes to online dating and matchmaking.  And, as in all things in this life, there are some pros and cons to this state of affairs.

On the positive side, I look at today’s online environment for singles as a banquet or feast.  In addition to the ability to reach out and search practically anywhere in the world to find other women, the addition of testing to online search sites gives us some really cool ‘systems’ and ‘theories’, if you will, that we can dive into, learn, take their tests and determine things like ‘your type’ and ‘those who might be attracted to or, complementary to, you’.

Then – on the negative or, ‘realistically optimistic’ side, or devil’s advocate position – think of the feeling you get when you’ve eaten (or drank) too much!  I don’t know about you, but its’ easy to become ‘overwhelmed’ by all of the ‘newfangled’ theories and methods available about love and dating on the internet today.

The good news is that there is significant power and resources being put behind the ‘problem’ of ‘finding a date, soul mate or life partner’.  There are several big time corporations now organized and powerful enough to do large scale research and development, beyond what your typical university or professor can do, and, for the most part, the results (and benefits to you) are worth considering.

One example of a ‘cutting edge’, research-based ‘compatibility’ system added on to your basic online dating is the Chemistry.com system.  I might be somewhat positively-biased on this one because I know Helen Fisher, the anthropologist who created the heart of their ‘personality typing’ and ‘matching’ system.

Helen’s system is based on her love: evolution and biology.  (more…)

Greg Halpen, TheGayGuysLoveCoach

I had a blast last night talking with Greg Halpen on Blogtalkradio’s TheGayGuysLoveCoach.  Thank you to Greg for inviting me onto the show and for being such a tremendous host.

Greg and I covered several ‘juicy’ areas during our discussion.  We even had a wedding planner call in to discuss how to handle couples who get ‘testy’ during the wedding preparations process.

Be sure you click here to listen in, the show lasted approximately 30 minutes.  You can listen via streaming and you can download a copy of the show via mp3 as well.

BTW, Greg and I are cooking up an event for the single gals and guys in New York City later this summer, so, be on the lookout for more information to come soon!

Unique Gay Dating Site Announces Official Pre-Valentine Launch

GetSteady.com today announced the official launch of its exclusive lesbian and gay dating community with the added reassurance of fully verified member photos. To celebrate the occasion, GetSteady.com is giving away three free months of unlimited access to everyone registering by February 28, 2009.

New York, NY (PRWEB) February 11, 2009 — GetSteady.com (http://getsteady.com), an exclusive gay and lesbian singles community with fully verified member photos, today announced its official site launch. The new website serves gay, lesbian, bisexual, transsexual and transgender individuals throughout the United States. Further setting its service apart, GetSteady.com is one of the only gay dating (http://getsteady.com) sites requiring all members confirm their authenticity via photo verification.

“I’m thrilled to officially launch GetSteady.com just in time for Valentine’s Day,” states Michael Zuyus, founder of GetSteady.com. “GetSteady was designed to help serious-minded men and women who are frustrated with the casual and superficial nature of gay online dating. GetSteady definitely fills a void in the industry, catering to those seeking honesty and commitment while offering a fun upbeat experience at the same time.”

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Wow, I heard about a fascinating study today that seems to add credence to the belief that astrology is snake oil!  A scientist from the UK looked at the birthdays of 20 million husbands and wives in the UK (in the UK’s 2001 Census) to see ‘if certain star signs were attracted to others ‘.

The scientist didn’t find a correlation between sun sign and who was married to whom.  He reports that the only ‘relationship’ he found was ‘chance’.

What do you think?  I’ve always questioned the whole astrology thing, given I’m probably more scientist than artist at heart.  I do know that I fit some Taurean characteristics (my sun sign), but not others.  Especially as I’ve gotten older, I less and less seem to fit the Bull!  …course, ask those close to me for the ‘whole story’! 

As long as folks don’t take the whole horoscope thing too seriously, it can be fun.  I’ve always thought astrology a great ‘ice breaker’ or conversation starter/lubricator.  I remember being in a gay golf league years ago and looking forward to getting together with other club members at an area restaurant after playing.  There was one woman in the club, an attorney no less, who loved to ask each of us ‘what is your sign?’ and launch into a comical ‘reading’ designed to tell us how to live our lives, who to love etc.

Also – before you go trashing the boring/nerdy scientists, I have to say that the scientist part of me reminds me that we are limited by the tools we have to observe what is.  So, perhaps we can’t definitively answer whether astrology is true or not!

Ultimately the author of the study believes people will still go on believing in ‘reading the stars’, eventhough his and ‘hundreds’ of other similar studies, seem to dispute the validity of the method.  He even points to celebrity pairings whose star signs should be compatible who had stormy relationships which didn’t last.

Such is the mystery of love and attraction and what people feel drawn to do to find and keep the love they have.  I myself recommend folks try a more conscious, ‘centered’, or, shall we say ‘grounded in reality’ method of finding, growing and cherishing love:  relationship coaching!

Then again, I’m starting to sound ever more like that ‘down to earth’ Bull that I am…. 

Click here to read the article!

Have a kissable day!

Barb Elgin