Commitment is an issue I’ve been talking about quite often during my ‘Just say no to lesbian bed death’ guest appearances on GayInternetRadioLive’s Lesbian Lounge.  Denise and Donna (I’ll refer to them hereafter as D&D) are the co-hosts and they are a riot.

I don’t know if it’s their ‘schtick’ or not, but Donna portrays herself as the committable type – she says she’s been in a committed relationship for four years now.  And Denise, who is a standup comedian, says she’s commitment-phobic.  Together, they are so different, down to their voices (Denise’ voice is deep and I told Donna she’s the one with the ‘lilted’ voice, which she loves to repeat!), all of which adds up to loads of chemistry between these two!

Anyhoo, as I mentioned in a prior post, I met D&D at GayDays in Orlando this past June.  Donna asked me to come on board as their guest lesbian relationship/life coach.  Currently, I have a spot between 9:30-10p ET on the first Wednesday of each month (although I was on the other night and I will be on next Wednesday as well…surprise, surprise!).

So, how do you date if your goal is a lasting, satisfying, committed relationship?

I know, does this question sound radical?  It should.  Afterall, gay or straight, most of us have had little to no support around the issue of how to best form a lasting, rock solid relationship with another human being.

How you date has everything to do with the type of relationship you end up forming with another person.  For example, how many of us have been in what we thought was a committed relationship only to find out our partner didn’t believe or act committed as well?  Could we have saved ourselves much time and grief had we gotten clear about our partner’s intentions earlier on in the relationship?

Being in a committed relationship with an attitude of pre-commitment is common amongst married couples in our society.  That’s why the divorce and breakup rate is so high.  In our culture we tend to go from falling in love to making a commitment, even though each has very little to do with the other!

So, if you are single or dating someone but not yet committed to them, THIS is the time to learn more about how you can make the dating process work FOR you, long term.

Don’t see someone exclusively and hold an exclusive mindset with him or her if you are sure he or she is not a potential life partner.

You see, dating should be fun, but, woven into the dating process is a process – if your ultimate intention is seeking a life partner there are definite steps you can follow to ensure you succeed at that goal.  Want to learn more?  Just go to Coach Sappho, a unique relationship resource for singles and couples.

And, be sure to stop by the Lesbian Lounge this coming Wednesday night, catch a love tip or two from me and laugh with D&D.

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If you are single and seeking your life partner, this is the only book you need…

If you have a single friend or family member that you care about, I invite you to get them this book…

If you would like to learn a bit about how to help your single friends or clients, this book is a great place to start…

Conscious Dating: Finding the Love of Your Life in Today’s World by David Steele (HARDBACK VERSION). The gold standard for single men and women! If you buy any book, make it this one!  Buy it here and get the ‘Conscious Dating’ CD.  $32.95 (includes shipping and handling) AND, while supplies last, the free CD, Conscious Dating for Relationship Success ($14.95 value).

Conscious Dating: Finding the Love of Your Life in Today’s World by David Steele and forward by Barb Elgin, MSW. (PAPERBACK VERSION).  $24.00 (includes shipping and handling). 

Below are some comments from counselors and professionals who have read the book…

“In Conscious Dating, David Steele provides a new concept for dating and insightful advice, effective exercises and useful illustrations that will help anyone who uses them make their journey to love successful. We recommend this book to anyone looking for love.”  — Harville Hendrix, Ph. D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph. D., co-authors of Receiving Love: Transform Your Relationship by Letting Yourself Be Loved

“Unconscious dating can lead to disaster. Given the serious effect of relationships gone awry, Conscious Dating is a must-read for singles who want to make better relationship choices. David Steele provides sound guidance and practical advice for today’s singles.”  — Pat Love, Ed.D. Author, The Truth About Love and Hot Monogamy

“David Steele has made a significant contribution to the world of relationships by mapping two previously foreign countries- consciousness and dating, bringing them together at last in this customized guide. Packed with practical strategies that really work, Conscious Dating is THE book for helping singles navigate the dating world.” — Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks, authors of Conscious Loving and the new Spirit-Centered Relationships

“This book is filled with practical strategies that work. Packed with solid advice, assessments and exercises, as well as interesting stories, Conscious Dating is a book that will completely change the way singles view dating and relating. A must-read for anyone who wants to create his or her next great relationship.” — Eve Eschner Hogan, Author of Intellectual Foreplay and How to Love Your Marriage

Here are some comments from singles about Conscious Dating…

“Conscious Dating is the most enlightened book on the topic of dating that I have come across.”
–Joseph Dunn, Rockville, MD

“I just love this book, it makes so much sense to me. ” –Elaine Kurtanich, Carnegie, PA

“Conscious Dating is MUST HAVE for singles. It is a complete, bullet-proof guide to finding your life partner that gives hope and clear step by step instructions of what to do and what not to do.” — Hilde Weimann, Bowie, MD