Whether you are single, dating or coupled, it’s time for YOU to begin the journey to experiencing more of what you want in your love life!   To help you continue your journey to a more amazing love life, I want to invite you to an exciting new tele-seminar I’m leading called

Coach Sappho’s ‘Secrets to Creating the Love Life You Deserve’ Tele-Discussion

You see, I’m sure you know success in anything requires more than reading a book, taking a quiz or, even chillin’ and having fun.  Success happens when we learn not only what works, but when we learn how to DO what works. Easier said than done, right?  All of this can seem pretty daunting, especially when it comes to love and relationships.

It’s been quite busy around here, necessitating my decision to change the time and day of Coach Sappho’s podcast.   I’ve moved Coach Sappho’s podcast to the first and third Thursdays of each month at 4p ET.  Please make note of it.  If you’re already a podcast subscriber, you’ll get a show reminder by Wednesday.

We hope you can join us during the live shows, but, if you can’t, be sure to pick up your free copy of Coach Sappho’s Podcast for listening when it’s right for you.  All podcast subscribers get free copies of all of our podcasts.

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Well, here I am on day two of Sweet’s Western Caribbean Cruise with two lovely celesbians!

This picture was taken right after the first of two speed dates I led on the cruise.  On the left is my co-host comedian and star of the Big Gay Sketch Show Kate McKinnon.

In the middle is Dani Campbell, of MTV’s reality show A Shot of Love with Tila Tequila.  One lucky gal who attended our speed date won a date with Dani!  I’m still trying to track them down to find out the scoop on how the date went! 

Not pictured, but important to mention is Lori, my bud from New Orleans who picked me up at the airport, took me back to the airport to go home, treated me to two days on the town in New Orleans with her friends AND helped me sign up speed daters and run the first speed date.  Thanks so much Lori!

All in all, we had two very successful speed dates on the cruise for the single ladies.  It seemed like everyone who attended had a great time.  Often I had to literally pry the women away from their dates to move on to their next date.  These gals loved to chat!

After each speed date yours truly sneaked back to her cabin, tallied all the matches and then flitted through the cruise ship, like the love fairy, delivering notices of matches to the many single ladies on board.

If you attended one or both of the speed dates, please let me know if you went out on any dates with your matches and, how it went.  Also – if you’ve decided to continue to date your match/matches, I’d love to hear about it!

Here we go again! Can you believe the holidays are almost upon us? For singles, holidays can be difficult in unique ways. While couples may be stressing out over which family to spend the holidays with or, arguing over how to budget for gifts, singles are often feeling lonely and ‘left out’. And, financially speaking, many don’t realize being single during the holidays can be tough in that you don’t have a partner to share the costs of gift giving.

Many singles dread the holidays because they fear going to parties and events alone. It’s easy to suggest to singles to ‘go with a group to parties’ or ‘call and invite a friend’, however, these solutions are not always practical or realistic.

Most singles will have to go to some events alone during the holidays.  What’s probably most upsetting about this for many singles is knowing there isn’t a partner to go to some events with, like they see their friends and family members doing.  When you have a partner, going alone to some events, when it’s necessary, isn’t as much of a bummer because you know you are going home to your partner.

While attending events with family and friends is nice, but it’s not the same as having a romantic partner to share time with during the holidays. Coupled lesbians often forget how it felt to be single during the holidays. If that’s you, ‘remember to remember’ your single friends this holiday season when you can.  Or, perhaps more importantly: just stay tuned into your friend. Does she (or doesn’t she) get upset during the holidays? If she does get bugged, what bugs her and how does she like to be supported when frustrated or experiencing negative feelings?

For those of us who celebrate Christmas, who hasn’t walked under the mistletoe at a dinner or party?  New Year’s Eve tends to be a particularly difficult holiday for many singles. Just imagine your favorite image of New Year’s Eve. Chances are you see couples partying the night away, including the proverbial kissing that goes at midnight.

So what’s a single lesbian got to do to get a date for New Year’s Eve?

If you are single (and not dating) right now, you can still find a date in time for New Year’s Eve, if you want one. It’s far from too late to get started. In the meantime, you may even find more than just a great date for the evening.

One secret to finding a great date for New Year’s Eve is taking some time today to begin getting focused on reaching your goal. You can easily start by setting aside 5-10 minutes to find a quiet, comfortable place to sit and visualize ‘in your mind’s eye’ that evening, complete with what you will be doing, where you will go, etc.

While you are dreaming up this wonderful vision, use ALL of your senses. Don’t just stop at the visual. Also dream with sounds, tastes, smells, touch, etc. Enjoy the process. After you’ve created a really cool ‘day dream’, just let your vision go. Then trust that you’ve already begun to set into motion your reaching your goal.

Want to learn four more secrets to attracting a great date for New Year’s Eve? Join me for Coach Sappho’s 5 Secrets to Finding a GREAT Date for New Year’s Eve.  We’ve offering three different days and times for the tele-seminars, to accomodate a wide variety of schedules and time zones.

Barb Elgin, MSW, LCSW, Certified Singles Coach, is Coach Sappho: America’s Favorite Lesbian Love Coach and Matchmaker. Are YOU ready for love? Ready to find out? Take Coach Sappho’s FREE Love Quiz.

© Copyright 2009, Barb Elgin. All Rights Reserved. Feel free to forward this article as long as attribution remains intact.

Disclaimer: The suggestions and feedback offered in this column are but one perspective of multiple approaches to dealing with problems or challenges. Information provided in articles and advice columns should not be used as a substitute for coaching or therapy when these services are needed. None of this information should be your only source when making important life decisions. This information should not be used for diagnosing or treating a particular problem, nor should it take the place of a consultation with a trained professional. It is your responsibility to consult a professional prior to making any life decisions.

Greg Halpen, TheGayGuysLoveCoach

I had a blast last night talking with Greg Halpen on Blogtalkradio’s TheGayGuysLoveCoach.  Thank you to Greg for inviting me onto the show and for being such a tremendous host.

Greg and I covered several ‘juicy’ areas during our discussion.  We even had a wedding planner call in to discuss how to handle couples who get ‘testy’ during the wedding preparations process.

Be sure you click here to listen in, the show lasted approximately 30 minutes.  You can listen via streaming and you can download a copy of the show via mp3 as well.

BTW, Greg and I are cooking up an event for the single gals and guys in New York City later this summer, so, be on the lookout for more information to come soon!

Unique Gay Dating Site Announces Official Pre-Valentine Launch

GetSteady.com today announced the official launch of its exclusive lesbian and gay dating community with the added reassurance of fully verified member photos. To celebrate the occasion, GetSteady.com is giving away three free months of unlimited access to everyone registering by February 28, 2009.

New York, NY (PRWEB) February 11, 2009 — GetSteady.com (http://getsteady.com), an exclusive gay and lesbian singles community with fully verified member photos, today announced its official site launch. The new website serves gay, lesbian, bisexual, transsexual and transgender individuals throughout the United States. Further setting its service apart, GetSteady.com is one of the only gay dating (http://getsteady.com) sites requiring all members confirm their authenticity via photo verification.

“I’m thrilled to officially launch GetSteady.com just in time for Valentine’s Day,” states Michael Zuyus, founder of GetSteady.com. “GetSteady was designed to help serious-minded men and women who are frustrated with the casual and superficial nature of gay online dating. GetSteady definitely fills a void in the industry, catering to those seeking honesty and commitment while offering a fun upbeat experience at the same time.”

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Media Contact:
Barb Elgin, CEO/Founder
Direct Line: 325-347-3577
Email: barb@coachsappho.com

LESBIANS OVER 35 LOOKING TO RE-DEFINE ROMANCE AND RELATIONSHIPS
Lesbians over the age of 35 now have an exciting new way to meet that special someone.

Summerfield, FL – February 10th, 2009 – As lesbians move away from early adulthood and become more mature, many re-assess their approach to meeting that special someone.

“With so many dating and social networks now targeting younger lesbians, I saw the lack of expert, focused support for lesbians who are seeking a life partner and decided to create something unique and appealing to the more experienced, mature lesbian woman,” said Barb Elgin, a Certified Singles, Dating and Relationship Coach with over 20 years of experience and the founder of Lez Rendezvous. “Lesbians over the age of 35 now have both access to a group of established women like themselves and the tools they’ll need to attract, grow and sustain a deeply satisfying, lasting relationship with another woman.”

Lez Rendezvous was created by Elgin, a 35+ lesbian herself, with the idea that lesbians over 35 have unique challenges meeting women of their caliber and age. Lesbians 35 and over are wise enough now to know they must not only be more selective in discovering who is a great partner for them but they must also learn to be a great partner.

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I’m sitting here, writing to you, enjoying one of those glorious Florida sunsets.  We’ve had another very busy and interesting week here at Coach Sappho.  Here’s a couple of highlights…

QUICK COACHING TIP: I was talking with a client recently about her vision collage.  Vision collaging is alot of fun and often results in ‘life altering’ realizations for many of my clients.  This client completed her first collage about six months ago.  We were talking about implementing the vision in this collage and she happened to mention making more collages.  I asked her if her vision had drastically changed from six months ago.  She said she didn’t think so.  Here’s how I responded to her:

“Your vision collage only needs to be done at most once a year!  After that you live it.  This can include making it the first thing you see in the morning and the last thing you look at before you go to sleep (in fact I highly suggest you do so).  When you continue to create more collages you will only get more of the same: more collages, possibly even conflicting visions.  Either way, this is not the best way to manifest your original vision…”

You see, if you keep ’starting over’ you don’t get very far.  Sometimes starting over is a way to resist moving forward.  This is also known as ’spinning your wheels’.

COACH SAPPHO INTERVIEWED FOR WATERMARK’S VALENTINE’S ISSUE: On a different, but related note, I had a great time the other day talking about lesbian love and romance with Steven Blanchard of the Watermark, Central Florida’s gay paper.  Steve titled the interview…

A minute with Barb Elgin, Lesbian Relationship Coach

The interview was short, but packed with tidbits such as…

• differences between gay and lesbian couples
• why we do the ‘U-Haul’ dance and what we can do to stop it
• secrets to finding the woman of your dreams
• keys to a successful relationship
• why opposites sometimes attract (and stay attracted)

Be sure to pick up the Watermark to read article in print if you’re in the Orlando area or, if you aren’t, no problem, click here to read it online!

SMART WOMAN FROM COACH SAPPHO’S COMMUNITY OFFERS HER ANALYSIS OF DEMOCRATIC NOMINEES FOR PRESIDENT: Several community members have been writing me regarding their concerns about the presidential elections coming up.  One thought that has stuck out for me is this one, sent by a pretty darn smart member of Coach Sappho’s community:

“It just ocurred to me that you might have some friends who are willing and able to contribute to Hillary Clinton’s campaign.  I’m not above pleading for their help.  Hillary is in a tough struggle against a well financed group who do not want to have a WOMAN in the White House in any other position than First Lady!  Hillary is the best one for the job, in my humble opinion.  Hillary is a PROVEN advocate for women and children over the past 35 years.

The link:   www.hillaryclinton.com/contribute/3UHQ”

Have a super weekend!

Barb Elgin
http://www.coachsappho.com/valentinesparty.html
Coach Sappho’s Valentine’s Tele-Party
Learn THE ONE and ONLY Secret You Need to
Know to Enjoy this Valentine’s Day!
Prizes for participants!
10% of each registration will go to Freedom to Marry